Missing: shoes

I just finished taking my very first test of the semester. I've gone about a month without a single test, and now I have 5 in just 6 days. I still consider myself lucky, though, when compared to many of my friends. Just about everyone I know is trying to get into grad school, and right about now is prime grad-school-entrance-exam taking time. Abbie will take the LSAT tomorrow, and I know that her one test is more important than the rest of mine. But I my easy weeks now will come back to haunt me when I have to take 8 actuary exams over the next several years.

About a week ago, my tennis shoes decided not to be in my closet. This baffled me, but I just assumed they'd turn up somewhere, and I wore my older shoes. Time went on, and my shoes still had not appeared. This means that I had been wearing my old tennis shoes with bloodstains (see below) on them for a whole week.
Every time someone has asked me what is covering my shoes, I have tried to make up a new story: I created some roadkill while walking down the sidewalk; I dropped a set of knives on my foot; I dropped some of my loot while robbing a blood bank. Little do these people know that the real story is much more gruesome: I spilled deck stainer on my shoes while staining a deck. Luckily, the deception can finally end, because Abbie's roommate Julie had my regular shoes hidden in her car.